Chasing Rainbows
It is one of those moody nights again, where I'm checking in here to write a #moodpost. Can't believe it's already more than a month since we last talked. I've imagined a hundred, perhaps a thousand times on how we would eventually lost in touch, however this is not something I would expect - cold turkey. It was an ordinary day, and it only took a few lines to stop all the communication we had before.
It takes only days to develop a bad habit, however a much longer time to break that off. Seeing each other for 5 times a week, and daily texts for the past one year is like a bad habit for me. No matter whether it shines or rains, I would always turn to you. Only after you left, I realize I've been relying on you that much. I knew I shouldn't have depended on someone impermanent in my life. Knowing that you will leave someday but somehow didn't stopped myself from doing so.
When it first happened, I was disappointed in you. However, later I learned that feelings of disappointment stem from having expectations of another person that go unfulfilled. So, it could have been me. I shouldn't have thought we were different, shouldn't have expected otherwise. Maybe we were never on the same page on how bonding works.
Perhaps the days were so fine, and you provided such comfort that I just let myself being taken care of. Perhaps the memories were so wonderful that it's hard to let them go, and to even think of them to be happening again would be too wishful. Perhaps, just perhaps one day all these will past.
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