当你关上了门离开 这个房间
关上了仅有的光线 只剩想念
我还感受到温柔的幻觉
月亮的背面 写满了我们的细节

* 我的回忆种满你曾对我说过的预言
开成了一座遗憾的花园
也许一天在挤满行人的那一条街
你才会发现我留下的空缺
(没有人能完全填补的空缺)

就当作我们不熟练 不够周全
就当作我们追不上 彼此改变
我以为能完美写下句点
时间在后面 遥控了所有的情节

幸福需要的磨练 我们都误解成搁浅
活在想象的明天 忘了今天未完结

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

最近很喜欢很喜欢的一首歌
怎么样听都不会觉得腻
每一次听完，都会想。。。
如果有一天我离开了， 会有人因为我的不存在而觉得寂寞吗？
留下的空缺因该会有人发觉吧
只可惜你到现在还没有发现我的离去是一个空缺。。。

Feeling guilty? Yes / No? Definitely YES...

Why? Because I've broken a promise or two.. Or might it be three or four more.. I felt bad for keeping the truths within myself, and yet after telling it out, I felt worse! I don't know am I supposed to keep my promise or not... At last, my heart tells me not to. I HAVE TO tell out the truths before the everything gets too carried away. telling a white lie is good for someone I guess... If I ever lied to you, please believe that it's for your own good. I know some people might think I'm only covering myself for lying but I whatever I did is never intended to hurt a person. Feeling truly sorry.

And now I know... Sometimes, it's really hard to keep a decent promise. Or might be this is the reason why you never keep your promises to me? I guess this must be it.
So don't ever bother if you can never fulfill it, because I already knew that you'll never be able to do what you have said in a life's time.

p/s: still, I believe that promises made are not meant to be broken... *I'm so gonna bang my head against the wall after this.. SORRY!*

The time now,
2305... (Moodiness...)

To the 4 person I've always loved.. and always will...

We've always quarreled and argued since the first day we knew each other, but that actually strengthen our friendship, and I've even like you more each day as my friend. It seems to be you've always have the right way to make me laugh and set me a good mood throughout the day. I always complained to you how worry am I, how stressful am I, how sad am I.. But after chatting with you, I'll feel better. Each time. And this time around, you told me that you feel sad + worry, and I'm sorry that I can't console you nor make you feel better like you did to me because in my heart, you are always a very cheerful and carefree person. You told me what's bothering you, and asked me to delete them from my memory unless I'm in a conversation with you because you don't want others to find out. Although I can't make u feel better, but I'll be a good listener and promise to keep your secrets well. I'm sorry that I argued with you again when you're not in your mood...

My darling girl... I wouldn't know whether your relationship will turn out well or not, but I still feel slightly guilty for not stopping you from starting this relationship which we all knew along that it won't work out. If I could have at least told you the truth, you would not be bothered by so much problems now. You called and told me all sorts of your feelings, and made me promised not to voice out a word to anyone... I did and so even in front of our closest friend, I will not betray you. However, I really hope you will not make the same mistake twice because once is enough for you to remember for the rest of your life. Just to say that I'm very thankful that our trust was build in no more than two years time, and I do appreciate you a lot. Your secrets too will forever kept hidden by me...

To you, I don't know what to say. I've called you all sorts of name... described you in all sorts of ways.. but who actually you are? Who actually I am to you? I don't know what exactly made us drifted so far apart.. You always leave me with mixed feelings... For once, I've tried so hard to maintain the friendship between us, but it turns out to me that you're not appreciating my every move. When I finally decided that I should back out, you came and approached me.. I really don't know what's on your mind then. Today, I've stricken with guilt by a truth I found out unexpectedly. You seems to be avoiding me and replied coldly, but all along you've treated me quite well.. But why? If you're really nice to me, why not show it... Is it because you felt sorry for me? Is there a guilt feeling you have for me? Or you feel that there's a need to compensate me for not keeping all the promises you've made? I don't understand.. and I guess I never will... Because you're a person who won't explain things. Anyway, I'm still very grateful to have known this, at least I know you're still very caring...

Lastly, to my dear who worried me most. I've seldom see you this upset. And the worse is, I don't know what your problem is. You told me that this is a secret you cannot reveal. You've never hidden anything from me before, so I guess this time it's really a very serious matter. You told me how much you wanted to tell me, but I told you not to. Because if you've decided not to tell me in the first place, I knew this is not something I can help you with. You were not even concentrating when we went out together, and whenever we stopped talking... your thoughts will wander far. You said sorry to me because you felt you've bored me and will continue to be like this for this recent period whenever we are together. But I won't mind my dear... It's because there's trust and faith between us, so I know you'll have your way to solve things.. and I chose to believe you. If there's one day you feel like exploding or you felt you can't keep the secret within you anymore, I'll be here available for you. Not only now, but forever will...