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My life, My memory, My dream

Expired.

The person told me that my car wash member card needs renewal. So, it has been a year. Last year, the day when we were supposed to have a simple study date spoiled by a car accident and ended up in the police station. The day you stood with me under the drizzle and argued with the man who deliberately knocked into my car, and held my hand tightly in the police station cause' I was too scared, and finally paid for the membership renewal fees just to have that 3 layers polish to make the scratch looks less visible. I couldn't accept your money like that, so I insisted to pay on my own. You gave in by letting me only paying half. 

Already tired out with this unexpected event, but on the same night promised to go out drinking with the cousin sister, and a long time friend. Couldn't say no cause' the friend was gonna bring her boyfie and friends to introduce to us. 

"How's it there? Ok ma? Fun?"
"Boreddddddd. Miss u dy"
"How come -.-"
"Well... A bunch of strangers"
"Miss me oh.. Real or nt de..."
"U don't believe me oh. Don't wanna miss u dy"
" :((((( "
" :(((( "
" :(( "
"Let u miss me"
"Miss u.. Haiz"

Time passed. Your message came again.

"Bie, u better take care and go back early.. Now already 1 20"
"Bie... At last I also drank, but not much. Only a glass"
"-.- a glass... How big? Beer or shot? U ok?"
"I think I'm okay"
"U better have an early night bie... Drive slow k. Slooowly :)"

Back then, we said we missed each other. You made sure I make it back home safely if I'm out late night. Only a glass of drink made you worried. The care you showed were so sincere and real, that's why I still sometimes miss the old you, the old us.

However, not only the card, but our relationship too, expired.


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Say hello to GUCCI!

Isn't she a cutie?
She seems to be accepting this new place as home and starts to response when I call her Gucci (a new name we gave her). Found this poor little thing on one of the weekends at grandma's place. It was a night with rain and lighting, and there she was wet and hungry hiding under the car. Couldn't leave her alone, so gave her food and bathed her. Then, we brought her home.

Mummy never liked pets, and sister is afraid. It's so difficult to keep this little monster with us, but they resented seeing how much daddy and I adore her. However, I know (somehow got this feeling), she's not gonna stay long with us cause' mummy will one day send her away. :( I do not dare to say or tell anyone that she's mine cause' once I claim ownership I know I'll be very upset when she leaves. I always tell people that she's only here at this moment, for now. I secretly hope she's going to stay with us permanently.


Lazing in the noon

Big-eyes fluffy girl :)

Feeling responsible now cause' I agreed with daddy to bring her home. Can't believe that there is this day, a puppy at home and having to clean her pee and poo. If she's here to stay, I'll give her the love and care she deserves. Promise. 


Totally engrossed with her new toy, ignoring me

The day she went out of the house, scared the hell outta' me. What if she went missing again and me never see her again? Got so mad that I scolded her for the first time ever since she's here (almost 2 weeks now).

She knows she's wrong


My everynight activity - to watch her sleeps soundly

I'll keep her with me for as long as possible. And if there's one day I couldn't do so anymore, I hope she's still being loved and cared feeling blissful, just like now.
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One of those moody nights again, and your words kept appearing. 

"I'll always be here for you", you said. 
"Don't worry, I'm always here de", you told me. 
"Sayang.. I told you I'll always be here for you", you emphasized.
"Seriously dear... It's ok de.. I'm here", you assured me for the Nth time.

Because of the many times you told me so, I began to rely you more and more when I'm upset, unhappy or when I had problems. You encouraged me during my downfall, told me it's alright and everything's gonna be fine, sacrificed sleep and talked to me until morning when I couldn't shut my eyes, horrified that bad dreams would came. 

After so long, tonight I had the sudden urge to call you again. To tell you that I'm in a dilemma, feeling upset and moody. And then, I decided whatever happened to me shouldn't have anything to do with you. I swallowed that urge to call, together with the lump that formed in my throat. I can handle my own tears now; without you comforting me at the end of the phone line - only to hang up after you are sure my tears dried and I can finally go to sleep in peace. 

 
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Life is really getting a bit leisure, couldn't remember the last time I've watched so many movies. Was on a movie marathon it seems, been watching 3 movies in 3 days consecutively. 

Had a dinner and movie date with dear on Monday night. Our original plan to watch "Pitch Perfect" was changed to "Rise of the Guardians" due to inappropriate timing. But, I'm glad we did cause' I loved it. It reminds me of "Polar Express" which I've watched years ago before Christmas came too. On Christmas eve, a boy boards on a magical train which brought him an adventure to the North Pole where he reached Santa Claus's home. That movie too gave me a magical journey which awaken the child in my heart. "Rise of the Guardians" again reminded me of the little one in me. This movie tells about how the immortal guardians protect every child's innocence from the attack of the evil spirit, Pitch. It's a movie about children, hope, miracle, and love.


I wonder if I have a guardian too

The little elves that especially caught my attention with their cuteness


The next day, Tuesday, mum, cousin sis and I decided to have a hangout day. Mum's not cooking, so we gonna watch "Life of Pi" before dinner time. The storyline is about a survival of a young boy, Pi with a Bengal tiger, Richard Parker after their ferry sinks during a heavy storm. We watched the movie in a normal 2D screen. I think the movie would be very much nicer in a 3D cinema cause' the adventure was epic with beautiful blue sea, crystal clear water, whale, dolphins...

Especially love the sparkling blue sea at night


Finally, Wednesday I am able to watch "Cold War", which I've really wanted to watch some time ago. I need some time to really understand this movie with its confusing plot. However, it is a very entertaining action-packed movie, with police forces wanting to encounter the enemies from within. Plus point of this movie is it comes with many big casts, and there is a "Cold War II" to look forward to.

Only these people alone makes me wanna watch it,  even without knowing the storyline at first

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About Me

About Me

Hi there! This is a personal space where I pour all my thoughts and mood posts into words. A place of serenity during sleepless midnights, and where I return to look at how far I've come and what had life gave me.



Live well, laugh more, love much. X

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