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My life, My memory, My dream

Time again, waits for no one. 
Can't believe that I only wrote a single post for year 2016. 

I've always like to pen down my thoughts and experiences so that I can always read them again and oftenly I have a different feeling / opinion from what I've felt previously. 

Though' I didn't manage to write down everything, but last year indeed was a fulfilling and enjoyable ride. I was grateful to be blessed with all the good and beautiful things, with all my loved ones around. 

If I were to mention one sad moment - that is the passing of grandma. Her passing was the lost of the entire family. The pain of losing her was greatly felt by my mum, who fell sick and cried for days. The last time I lost someone as close was almost 13 years ago, when grandpa left us suddenly, just 2 weeks before Chinese New Year. Through them, I learnt bout' family and unity. And thanks to them I'm sharing a strong bond with my cousins. I guess grandparents have done all they can for us, and lived most of their lives. Grandma would have met grandpa by now - and they are prolly' looking at us, making sure all of us are fine. 


P/s: Maybe I should make "updating my blog weekly" one of my resolution for Year 2017 😛

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to leave
to grow up on my own
to learn about being independent.

That was my thoughts one and a half year ago. 

I do not know anything about moving out, because this is my first time. But,  it proved that this is the perfect distance to move out. Enough to gain independence and freedom, and sufficient to run back home crying if I miss home too much. It is only a 2 and a half hours drive (oops, sometimes I only need an hour and a half)

While I was here, the only thing I think about is leaving. And finally, when I've decided to hand in my transfer letter requesting to be back home - there's a tiny twinge of hesitation. It's time to do so because I've always believed that when I am in a comfort zone, then I should move out and challenge new things again.

No more counting down,
Cause I'm still here at Temerloh - the small town where I've met some kind people, made some really good friends and the place I've grown to be comfortable with.

Till' then I will wait for my next destination while serving as much as I can here. 

p/s: After such long time, the first post in this 366 days. 
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Very quickly, time past and birthday was here again last two weeks. As I grow older, lesser the friends I spend my time with - the ones left are my family, dear and a few more close friends who are here for me no matter what happens. I guess this are friends for life. 






After birthday past, I know I have merely another 16 weeks to a year at Temerloh now. When I first came to this unfamiliar place and staying away from home for the first time, other than the tiny tinge of excitement, all left was just fear and endless worries. However, I'm glad that I'm finally settling in and got to know some kind and helpful colleagues as well as new friends. People here do not stay - they come and go, and each time when someone leaves, I do not know if we will see each other again.

Staying away from home gives me the freedom that I've never had before. A snap of idea on what I want to do next, I can just make it happen. However, staying alone too means being responsible to myself and independent at all times. I've experienced things I've never imagine myself doing before - I now can eat alone, jog alone, sleep alone in an empty house, even coming to the cinema to watch movie alone. The body immune system seems to be building up too when I'm alone. Without the endless care and homecooked food from mummy, just a night's of long sleep makes the body recovers fully the very next morning. 

Other than being alone during on call times, I have a bunch of friends that I laugh and eat with every night, play badminton on every Tuesday night, sometime movies on Wednesdays - I think life isn't at all bad here. 

But no matter what, home is still where the heart is. I will return, someday soon.

112 days left at Temerloh..
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8.3.2015

This beautiful couple finally marries. The best friends I've known for 9 years. Like the groom said "9 years isn't a short time". To be able to witness them from the day they started till' this day when they are finally living life as one, makes me want to believe that I can love and be loved too. 

Thanks to this pair, they made their wedding day a memorable one and extra meaningful as we meet a lot of friends from the past. Those days when we had so much fun together, and those days when we hugged each other and cry. This wedding is like a gathering, a reunion, a happy ending. Every ending is a new beginning, so although I'm flowing tears missing the past - I shall move on and till' we meet again.

Counting down to,
175 days left. 


With the beautiful bride and handsome groom 

Those were the days when we had most fun together -- inseparable 

Me and my dear - Everything is always a little better when you're around :)


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因为太累,在车上睡着了。。无意中让我听见他们的谈话。

Daddy: 女儿在后面睡着了。
Mummy: 是咯。出了一整天她累了,明天还要开车回去 (Temerloh)做工。担心死了。

而我就感动死了。当 daddy mummy 的女儿太幸福了

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will be shed when the emo-ness slowly sinks in. Blame it on pms, blame it on working alone on a family day (Sunday), blame it on the hot and cold weather. 

But, deep down I know... because the best friend is leaving - my only support when I first came to Temerloh. Here, I've shed twice tears. Once on the second day of work, where I suddenly thought of my family and how badly I missed them. I remembered the hugs I had with mum and dad on the day before, then the tears won't stop flowing. And so, I excused myself to the toilet. Second, it was today when the lift door opened and I hugged my best friend goodbye. Things won't be the same without her here. Once again, I feel I'm lost. Just like back to 4 months ago when I first came - alone and lonely. 

Guess this too will be the last time I cry. Nothing here will make me ever drop a tear I think. Can't wait to be back to home.


Counting down to,
275 days left.
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a new place where I'm currently working. Been moved down to this small town for a month now already. As the day goes my, my heart is reaching more to home where my family and friends are. I thought things will get easier as time passes, but reality is the opposite way. The more I stay here, the more I yearn the days I was back at home, the place I worked, to meet the people I used to meet. I guess that's the way human is - to miss what's not here anymore.

Slowly, I'm learning bout being independent, away from being daddy's girl, to stay quiet in a small town, to sleep in a tiny room without air-cond, to travel every week driving long distance on my own (if I'm not working on the weekend)... Endless things I'm learning and growing up. Shall be strong and return home to be a better person.

Counting down to,
334 days left.  
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About Me

About Me

Hi there! This is a personal space where I pour all my thoughts and mood posts into words. A place of serenity during sleepless midnights, and where I return to look at how far I've come and what had life gave me.



Live well, laugh more, love much. X

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